In that moment, it felt like Grandma was the same woman they grew up with.
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On the first day of our visit we struggled to piece together just how much awareness she has left in her.Īs we all sat awkwardly in the nursing home courtyard, unsure of what to say or do, or even how to feel, my sweet Havyn swept in and used her caregiving magic to make Grandma come alive. Once a sharp, opinionated, loving beyond measure, dynamic force of nature is now an aged woman whose brain has been brutalized by tumors and all their vicious aftermath. Last week my family flew to Florida to visit Grandma. You’ll hardly notice her at first and then suddenly, without realizing it, her nurturing and quirky ways storm straight into your heart. And once she’s comfortable, she makes her voice known.Ī friend appropriately dubbed her “The Quiet Storm” after nearly falling off his chair once he heard how much she actually speaks.Īnd all I could think was – you’re damn right, a quiet and beautiful storm she is.īecause her quiet soul sneaks up on you. She may be quiet but she has A LOT to say. And with our encouragement, she’s been learning to use what I lovingly call her “brave voice”out in the world more and more. I often think of her as “Nurse Havyn,” always looking to see who she can find to take care of next.īut my shy serene soul is no pushover, she has a well of strength and old soul wisdom within her. She once even packaged up a bunch of her toys into bags with instructions for me on which friends I should give each of them to. When we have playdates she walks around passing out food and drinks to kids and grown ups alike. My tiny little four-year-old has the caregiving skills of an adult. She doesn’t seek the spotlight, SHE IS the freakin light, shining it on those around her. She doesn’t demand attention, she gives her attention, always looking for someone to nurture.
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She doesn’t reveal her full self to the world, she makes you earn her trust. “There is just something about Havyn…” one of our closest friends always says, “I want to eat her up she’s so freakin delicious.”ĭelicious she is. She is pure joy and those who know her well are often captivated by her. And ever since she was a baby, she wakes up with a smile on her face and that smile hardly ever fades when she’s home with her family. My girl is feisty and quirky, chatty and silly, artistic and imaginative. To know her, the real her, is to know pure magic.
The one who observes more than she speaks.Īnd the shy child within me knows exactly what it’s like to be her.īut her shy demeanor is only a fraction of who she is. She is known at school as “the quiet one.” The one who plays independently. She has been that way since she was a baby. Once my anger subsided I was simply shattered that someone dared to so judge my precious little girl, knowing too well that she’ll likely face such judgements well into her future.īut yes… my little girl, Havyn, is shy.
In that moment it took all I had within me to calm my inner mother bear. The words were spoken with the same disdain one might use to say “incompetent” or “useless.” My youngest daughter was recently judged very harshly by an adult for being “too shy.”
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